27 March 2008

I'm being torn apart by me, and the whole world is just watching

Hi. Remember what I've just told you about my dream that I saw last night ?! Actually I've imagined myself seeing that dream ! :). I needed to imagine myself seeing that dream because I really needed to explain to myself and to you why all those horrific things are happening to my Iraq. The thing that really scares me is that SOME Iraqis do care about wealth, influence, and power more than they care about their Iraq, that SOME Iraqis have forgotten that they're IRAQIS. Just take a look at what is happening in my Iraq these days : The Iraqi government and the Iraqi security forces are launching an assault against Al Mehdi army in Basra and other Iraqi cities including the capital Baghdad on behalf of Badr militia. And the biggest loser in this continueous power struggle is the Iraqi people. In the meantime rockets and morter shells continue to fall around upon the heads of innocent Baghdadi civilians in many Baghdadi districts including my beloved district, Al Karradah. With my love. Yours forever, Lubna.

2 comments:

Hannah said...

Hi Lubna,

I have finally tracked you down!
It was great talking to you on WHYS the other week.

This may sound funny but it is nice to think that a 21 year old student from the uk, can be talking to a 21 year old student from Iraq.

The wonders of modern technology!

Anyway keep moderating and see you back on WHYS xxx hannah

voice of one crying said...

lubna,

yesterday i saw an amazing movie by michael furanti. he is a poet/musician/activist. he made a documenatary of people in war zones, called "I know I'm not alone," and the movie was all about your dear city, baghdad, and israel and palestine--he visited these three places, and captured people and sites, telling what it's like to live where they do!



i saw footage of Al-Mansor Pediatric hospital! do you go there in your training? i saw children inside, and an adult, with their various illnesses and missing limbs, as direct results of the violence in baghdad from the US bombing and subsequent mess.

at one point in the movie, an Iraqi man said something like, "with sadam it wasn't good, but at least it wasn't this mess." that really struck home for me. my heart aches and aches until it feels like it wants to break, for the horror that my country has wrecked on Iraq! i wish my heart WOULD BREAK--i could perhaps feels some "Result" from the ache, and yet it can't seem to break, because there is nothing i can break it on--there seems to be only a dead, dull, presence of what we have done,--i can't undo the horror, and so the aching continues, and i want to die, the feeling is so insurmountable.



i think that is how grief is (a feeling of the pain/ache being insurmountable), and much of my horror IS GRIEF. there is so much to be sad and mad for in the situation of iraq!



i wish people would stand up in protest in such a way that would stop that maddness!? but what can we do? our protesting seems for naught. but i know it can't be, because if we don't protest, what else can we do? even if it's not bringing immediate results, i must believe it will bring SOMETHING DIFFERENT, OVER TIME!



lubna, we are coming up on the first anniversary of the death of sarah, and both noor's. what is the date for sarah? it sounds awful to say "the anniversary of the death of," but that is what it is!



i think of you often. you are always in my heart. don't give up hope, lovely.

all my love, yours forever! anita